wish you well.

i stumbled upon this song on hushpls's facebook page this morning.

and fell in love with it.

the timing couldnt be more right.

dad usually kiss me every morning as i left for work.

but today he wasnt sitting outside, reading the newspaper. he was in bed.

i was hugging him when he said "im not well today, theres something wrong w my heart"

the goes my heart, thumping like crazy.

"i didnt managed to complete the 4 fours dialysis session yesterday, my heart was too weak. lasted only for 2 hours. need to go to the hospital again today, for check up"

i wanted to cry and hug him and just cry. i wish i could give him my health. i wish i could give him my strength. looking at his chest, breathing his short breath rapidly makes me want to die.

but i didnt do any of that.

i hugged him, just like always and say, "okay, i'll call you for updates later"

and left.

dad is a kidney failure patient. it happened almost 10 years ago. he has to go for dialysis sessions for every monday, wednesday and friday (4 hours per session).

i hate to admit that his health has deteriorated since.

whenever i see him struggle to climb up the stairs or to even stand up, i keep telling myself hes just old. its going to be okay.

but hes not going to be okay. hes not just old. he is sick.

gosh i wish i could turn back time. i know he wishes he could turn back time either.

anyway, this song kind of cheered me up.

wish you well by katie herzig.

get well soon, dad.

i love you.